Singers that might be Deaf

I have decided to start monitoring the number of famous singers that sound like they’re deaf. There’s no reason for this, I just think it’s funny.

Firstly, Dido. I’m not saying she’s bad, that’s a decision you can all make on your own, but love her or hate her, she sounds like a deaf girl, there are no edges on anything she sings. For example, sing this phonetic sentence

Bore Gibbin de ba bes daaaaii

Sounds like that Dido song doesn’t it.

Then Fall Out boy. That singer. What’s going on? You know that song they did, I don’t know what it’s called because despite having heard it on the radio 1 million times, I still haven’t managed to decipher a single word he is saying, I think there’s something about a gun, maybe, could be gum I suppose, I’m not sure, and at the beginning he says “I’m a mong in a barbershop” or something along those lines. But anyway, he’s the greased up deaf guy from family guy isn’t he? He’s got to be. Just listen to that guy sing and tell me he’s not deaf. He’s definitely deaf.

The deaf singer phenomenon is universally funny. Wether you’re black or white, male or female, gay or straight, listening to a shit singer warble like a deaf man is hilarious. If you are aware of any other deaf singers, please email me and let me know.

While on the subject of singing, is anyone else surprised that snoop dog has to resort to pimping to supplement his income. You’d have thought that being an international rap sensation for over a decade would have given him the opportunity to put a little money aside.