The Cowardly Cyclist

Check out this dicks website. He found my Practical alternative to the bike article, obviously took a bit of offense to it, then leached the text out of it and put it up on his site, disagreeing.

Disagreeing in the lamest possible “I don’t really have an answer” way I might add.

However, because he’s a spineless bike riding pussy, he only put the first half of it up and edited out the second half which completely justified everything I said and showed why his childish hobby was so unhelpful.

Now I have two problems with this. Firstly, if you disagree with something I say and want to comment, you actually have to have reasons for your disagreement. At not one stage did he mention anything that approached a sensible justification for his position, and worse than that he wasn’t even brave enough to include the part of my article in which I justified mine. If you want to disagree fine, but give me reasons. You could have said that if we all rode bikes instead of cars then there would be no congestion problem at all, which is obtuse, but at least it’s an argument. If you have an opinion you have to have reasons for it, and “I love my bike” just isn’t good enough.

Secondly, who the fuck has a website dedicated to Bicycles? It’s a mode of transport you shameless geek, you don’t need to get down on your knees and suck the saddle off. It’s just a bike, there seems to be something about the cyclist mentality that makes them fall in love with the fucking thing. Is it because they ride it? Does the saddle rub them in just the right way and they become too attached? They ride around giving it the big I am “Look at me, how good am I, I’m riding a bike and everything” Get over it cycle boy, I’ve been able to ride a bike since I was 6, you’re not special.

OK so he likes his bike, fine, but a website dedicated to how much he likes it? How many things on this mans to do list must he have got through before he got to the item “Put page up on internet telling everyone how much I love my bike”. It’s just a way to get around you loser, you’re not going to find an article on here saying “Yesterday I walked down the stairs using my legs, my legs are great, I love my legs”.

He says all smugly in his utterly blunt argument that I have comments turned off, implying I’m scared of getting a response. Yet on his ultra dull site you have to be a member to post a comment anyway, so he’s basically done the same thing. Comments are off on my site because I don’t want fucking morons like this guy putting his mindless shit up on it. I’ve posted my email address so people are welcome to say what they like to me, and I genuinely am interested in anyone who has anything sensible to say, but I’m not going to give every retard with an internet connection rights to post stuff on my site.

Just for a laugh I read some of his posts “It was raining today, so I wore another layer, I find that I try to wear more layers, the colder it is, the rule of thumb for this is…” My fucking god why are you bothering, could you actually be more dull? Nobody cares you dreary loser, you’ve got nothing to say.

But my favourite bit of all is the part where he says “This guy would have us believe that the socially responsible among us would give up our bikes for automobiles, if only to avoid inconveniencing motorists.”
If this brainless muppet had managed to get his bike fetish crazed mind off dry humping his saddle for 2 minutes, he’d have noticed that my article clearly states that I think they should be allowed to ride on the pavements instead of the road, I did not suggest people give up riding them.

And just for the record, social responsibility involves doing what is best for the largest number of people, so even if I had told you all to give up riding your bikes, I’d still be right, and you’d still be a cunt.

Now run along and post another dull update about your clothing decisions on your utterly pointless waste of webspace.