Paparazzi – The sensible solution

I fucking hate paparazzi, I mean really, what a bunch of parasitic scumbags. Their job is to stalk celebrities and take photo’s that nobody should care about, and I don’t understand why it’s legal.

Firstly, if they didn’t have the camera, it would be stalking, so surely it should still be stalking even with the camera. Why is it that because he’s taking photos of someone it’s suddenly not stalking, that’s stupid.

Obviously I’m not famous, so it doesn’t affect me, but I fucking hate the fact these people can make a living off the back of someone else being famous, it’s pathetic. Magazines like Heat make me want to cry all the water out of my body, surely we don’t care if Cameron Diaz looks a bit skinny, and are we really surprised that Victoria Beckham doesn’t look as good when she’s just got up in the morning as she does after fifteen hours of hair and makeup. It’s a pathetic horrible excuse for a magazine and it’s making girls care about something they really shouldn’t be.

If women are still wondering why they don’t get as many positions of power in British industry as men, it’s basically because too many of you are wasting your minds worrying about Kylie’s breast cancer.

I know that a lot of celebrities court the attention, but a lot of them don’t, and I don’t see why their entire lives have to be monitored and judged by the general public. They sing songs or make films, that shouldn’t mean their entire lives should be on the front of a magazine, that’s bullshit. There are a lot of celebrities that don’t want the paparazzi following them around everywhere, and if they were intelligent, they could easily stop them.

And this is how….

They form a union for celebrities that don’t want the paparazzi to follow them around. Anybody can join, and there should be no set fee. They should send a letter to the editor of every showbiz magazine requesting they do not purchase photographs of any of their members from any paparazzi. The editors will no doubt ignore this request and continue to print photographs which they think will help sell their magazines. And then this will happen to them……

The union will employ 100 people to get camera’s and follow the editor that ignored their request absolutely everywhere he goes. They will follow his kids to school, they will follow him to work, they will follow his wife out shopping. They will climb trees and take photo’s of him through his windows and in his garden. Whenever he tries to walk anywhere they will crowd around him yelling things and flashing cameras in his face, and it will go on and on and on.

The Union will then write a letter to the magazine explaining that for every picture he publishes of one of their members, this will go on for a month.

See how many of them ignore that advice. It must be legal, because the magazine editors are paying people to do the exact same thing. They can’t take the union to court, because if they win it would set a precedent that would mean it was illegal for them to do it as well, and then they couldn’t buy photo’s of any celebrities at all. The only two choices are living with photographers hounding them each and every day or stop buying photo’s of celebrities in the union.

I wish I was a celebrity, then I could fuck with media. Bunch of cunts.